The power of Positive Thinking
"When my child was ill with anorexia I became depressed. One of the things that really helped me was to learn about positive thinking. I remember learning to S.O.S my thoughts :- 'Stand back - Observe - and Steer'.
This helped me realise when my thoughts were negative or 'catastrophising' and I started to look at things in a different way. I think this helped me to feel calmer and I felt I was better able to empathise and connect with my child, and remain strong to support them through to complete recovery"
It is easy to look at situations in a negative frame of mind. Consider the following example:
"A lady was walking down the street and she saw a good friend she hadn’t seen for a while walking towards her. As she approached, the lady smiled but the friend completely ignored her.
The lady carried on walking and her thoughts were that the friend had done it on purpose, she didn’t like her, she must have done something wrong, she was a horrible person, no one can like her.
The friend was walking along deep in thought. She had a lot going on at home, family issues, money issues and was trying to figure things out in her mind. She was so engrossed that she was oblivious to what was going on around her and didn’t even see the lady approaching."
This style of 'negative' thinking is often found where individuals have low self esteem and lack of confidence, they may automatically think that other people deliberately avoid them or talk about them. In reality this is probably never the case. It can be helpful to consider ‘the other side’ to these situations.
You may be interested in some of the books on Thinking styles /Positive Thinking listed below and in the Further Reading section.
• Positive Psychology – a Practical Guide (by Bridget Grenville-Cleave)– 'This is a great pocket sized book packed full of really accessible and interesting information and suggestions. This one includes plenty of self help exercises.'
• Brilliant Positive Psychology - What makes us happy, optimistic and motivated (by Charlotte Style) - 'a wealth of information, ideas and exercises'
• Emotional Intelligence (by Daniel Goleman)
• Learned Optimism (Martin E. Seligman) - " Explains how important a parent's own 'explanatory style' can be in influencing his / her child's optimism and ability to deal with life's adversities","Explores how to overcome the 'learned helplessness' which often accompanies depression, with self-help exercises."
• Positive Thinking courses are available free of charge from ‘Inner Space’, Chelmsford: https://www.chelmsfordinnerspace.org.uk/
Boost your mood!
Certain nutrients can help improve the way one feels, so a balanced diet is important.